There must be a knack to using a European bidet but I don't know what it is. I tried to use one, once, in Venice and nearly did myself an injury.
It makes sense in Asia, where they almost never have toilet paper and you get a hose instead (not a sit down bidet) so you can direct the water whichever which way you wish. At times, going to the toilet in Istanbul resembled having a shower in a very unhygenic paddling pool. (Ick)
But in Europe - when toilet paper is readily available and they have the smallest bathrooms in the world - why do they cram a bidet in there as well?
The main function of the bidet seems to be to confuse tourists. In the middle of the night, when you are groping around in the dark trying to find the loo, you have to establish which is the bidet and which is the loo. Not easy when you are half asleep.
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